The Case of the Broken Penis

The last couple weeks at work have been quite frustrating. It's just the same old garbage. But today, I decided not to let any of it bother me. I was talking with my mom about her own work woes this weekend, and she commented that "some people get mad just because they can, but that doesn't mean they should." In the grand scheme of things, really, none of this is going to matter. What WILL matter, however, is how I react to it and how I treat people in response. I'm bolstered by the hope that I won't be doing this very much longer anyway - being an ENFP (see previous post for an explanation), the future is always bright.

So today, I looked for (and found) the humor in just about every situation. Instead of getting angry about the stupid little things that happen all day, every day, I just made some smart remark with a smile, laughed and walked away. One case in particular brought a smirk to my lips.

We have a client who was recently sued by a man who broke his penis in their warehouse. He slipped on some ice and had a "straddle" accident that required major surgery. The irony lies in the fact that the man is a convicted sex offender, and his case was tried before the first openly lesbian judge in Colorado (she's sixty). In the end, he was awarded about $740,000 for medical expenses, pain and suffering, attorneys' fees and legal costs, and Permanent Impairment (he's impotent and permanently catheterized from the injury).

When I was discussing this case with the attorney, he asked me how much I thought was a reasonable amount for permanent impairment. The medical expenses amounted to over $250,000; he was also awarded $300,000 for pain and suffering. I thought I was being generous when I said, "oh about $100,000 for permanent impairment." Apparently the judge thought that was quite generous as well, having awarded $25,000 to the man for his broken penis.

You can't make this stuff up folks.